I couldn't smile today, so I gave a really fake one. :( & that's my sister btw.

Baby, are you willing to give up so much that we've been through together? I can't believe you're. You don't know how im feeling now. I feel like getting knocked down by a car right now. It's so heartbreaking. By now, you might have lost all the love you once had for me, cause you don't trust me anymore as you said. I know, I only hurt you, only make you cry. But have it occured to you that im trying very hard to change?? Maybe you don't see it, yeah, it takes plenty of time okay. Maybe you're now thinking that, yah take your time now as we're friends to change, then we'll see how it goes. Well, who's gonna help me now when I have no one's guide but yours?

Look @ that, look at how much we were happy then. & that was my birthday, you were so happy, & so was I.
You said to me that you're happy in that picture cause I tickled you. :\ I'd never believed that. This is my most favourite picture taken with you. Makes me so happy in my heart.
My first hug was to you, 2nd kiss onwards, the first guy who puts his hand around my waist, first guy I've ever loved so much & so dearly! I guess you can't really really see that I was madly in love with you then cause I was too, trying to change my own attitude & it's not easy to juggle both together. Doesn't seem to link right? But trust me, it does.
It's so hard to tell you that I love you now. I miss you calling me Darling & Baby. :'( You know that?? You never did call me those for 1month plus. It's not only there, when you tell me that you love me on the phone, it sounds half-heartedly said. You're tired of this love, everything that happens, yeah same here. But WHY ARE YOU GIVING UP ON ME WHEN I NEVER GAVE UP ON MYSELF? :'( We once said, we'll go through every problem & obstacle together. I loved you since 16 September 2006, & that date was a coincidence that it's my parents wedding date. I didn't know it till this year when I asked them when the got married.
Last time, I chose to leave you, leave this love, cause I needed time on my own & on our own to calm down & time for me to change my attitude. Coming to realise that I needed your guidence. Maybe I took you for granted, maybe, just maybe. We're a young couple, so much more to learn. If you can't take this much, if next time you were to have someone as your wife, more problems & tougher problems are gonna be faced.
Me saying so much now also no use, cause I guess you don't love me anymore, you don't trust me anymore.
It's not easy to prove it to you as my friend, cause I wouldn't even have your attention to me.
I miss you Dennis. :'(