YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M VERY FRUSTRATED WITH MYSELF SERIOUSLY. I'M ANGRY WITH MYSELF, I'M PISSED WITH MYSELF, I'M..... ARGHHH!!!!!

Rosanne! What is wrong with you! Why are you so sensitive about your past when it's brought up now! Everything you're thinking of, is it worth thinking of or not? You're just wasting your time for goodness sake! Why are you getting affected by all these! I thought God was who you loved the most in this whole wide world now?! Where's that gone to? Down the brain?! That's really like platypus poop Rosanne. (That's me typing out to myself.)

Why am I like this man :'( I really wished that what I had & did in the past, never did happened. But then again, if it didn't happen, will I even be brought to church & realise that there's a God who cares about you more than anyone else in this world?
God loves you Rosanne, He loves you from the inside out.

Y'all wanna know why I'm being like this? Y'all can actually guess it somehow.
It's about yes, my exboyf. I really hate to touch that topic okay. It's annoying because I feel like crying again & again & again because of all the past that's happened. It hurts, it breaks one's heart badly.
That's actually not what happened, but what how I felt. Forget it, :'( I wanna cry it all out to God.

I've been mugging this whole week but not yesterday. Sabbath day, remember? A day of rest.
I've been studying from Monday to Friday straight. & actually, Friday, I studied 12 hours! Okay if you're talking about consistently studying, then it's like 8 hours? I'm not kidding man.

Went to buddies to meet up with Sarah, Alastair, Warren, Teckhan, Junjie, Timothy, Kirby & Andy.
Studied, eat, studied, eat. Went home after so. :D

Yesterday! Since it was Sabbath day, I decided to give myself a break from the long hours of study I did this whole week! But today I'm still gonna study.
Sermon yesterday was about the 10th commandment which is about coveting.
I'm not really in the mood to go into details now. But basically, coveting is about desiring something that's not of any worth, desiring & craving for it so much, that you place that first in the centre of your mind & heart but not God Himself.

So, I didn't attend bible study today. Mommy was alone at home, so I decided to stay with her.

School tmr. =/ Oh well.